This Or The Housework

Digging for Treasure

2010-08-25T13:54:00.000-07:00

Worried about us?

Want an update?

I just saw Sawyer pick his nose, study his findings and place them safely in his pocket.

This is my life...I'm learning to choose my battles.

Happy Kind Of Birthday Hunny

2010-07-09T00:30:00.000-07:00

Today is my dear husband's birthday. Kind of.

I say that because he was born this day in 1981, making him 29 this year. So while today is technically the anniversary of his birth, it seems that this specific birthday's only purpose is to remind his family and friends that his youth is behind him.

Today, and in the days leading up to today my husband's life has been filled with such witty and thought provoking remarks as...

'29 eh? Next year's the BIG ONE'

'Big 3-0 next year, man! It's all down hill from there.'

'29 is really just a place holder for 30 so I'm not getting you anything.'

That last one was me, but if more of you say it to him it might actually fly. And if you're not willing to do that and insist on getting him something... can I sign your card?

So while everyone else is looking towards the saggy future, I want to take a minute to acknowledge what a great, good looking, funny and sweet, YOUNGER wife you have. And I'll still be all those things next year so I guess you're not doing too bad for yourself!

Oh yeah and your kind of the greatest husband and father EVER!! So you've got that going for you too!

HAPPY ALMOST 30TH BIRTHDAY KEV!!!

At Least I Won't Have to Worry About Him Being a Teenage Father...

2010-07-06T02:43:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I think back to my highschool days, when I used to sit around with my girlfriends and list off the many, MANY features our dream men should have. The top of my list then, and to this day is a sense of humour. I think back to those days and those conversations and I think... SHIT.

Here is a conversation I had earlier with my almost 3 year old son.

3 year old: 'Mommy say knock-knock'

Me: 'Knock-knock'

3YO: 'Who's there?'

(alright I'm with you kid)

Me: 'Boo'

3YO: 'Boo WHAT?'

(really?!?!?!)

Me:'Nevermind... why don't you tell me a knock-knock joke?'

3YO:'Ok... Knock-knock'

Me:'Who's there?'

3YO:'Apple'

(ahhh a classic)

Me:'Apple who'

3YO:'Woof woof I'm a puppy'

Maybe it's me? Maybe his sense of humour is just too sophisticated? But I just can not find the co-relation between that apple and the dog.

But maybe that's the joke?

Maybe... but more likely??? It's lucky he's so ridiculasly good looking.

It's My Anniversary and I'll be Snotty If I Want To

2010-07-04T10:25:00.000-07:00

As of July 1st 2010 I have been married 4 years. I celebrated this milestone by waking up in an empty house. My husband choose that day and the one before out of all the 365 days in the year to go on a kayaking trip with his father. His logic was that, since I had to work, we wouldn't get to see each other anyway. Plus he would be home in time to take me to dinner and a movie. Sound logic, sir.

But there's one little detail you did not take into consideration.

It's our anniversary so I don't have to succumb to logic. Let the guilt trips begin.

You like apples?

My kids also choose that evening to have a sleepover at Grandma's. Which brings me back to waking up in an empty house.

I spent the entire previous evening curled up in the fetal position, baseball bat in hand, because OBVIOUSLY burglars were going to choose that night to come after my wealth of broken toys and dirty laundry (the only things I have a wealth of). When I finally realized that, that would actually be a good thing (better they pick them up then I) I was able to fall asleep.

The next morning I woke up to lots of blankets, extra pillows and room to sleep in whatever position I so desired. Which I did. Through SEVERAL snooze cycles.

Then I woke up and got ONLY myself ready, just to get in the car and drive straight to work... not 20 mins out of the way (to the sitter's) and then to work.

So I was going to make Kevin make up for this in a big way on our next anniversary, but instead I think I'll just book him another kayaking trip.

Happy Anniversary Hunny! You look as handsome now as you did on our wedding day! You totally can't even tell you have 2 kids! <3

Life Experiences

2010-06-27T16:01:00.000-07:00

Well just yesterday Sawyer attended his second kegger (it was Sean's first awwwwwww). I know that the legal drinking age is 19, but they're going to find a way to do it anyway! So I'd really prefer if I was there to make sure that they're okay.

Naw I'm totally joking. I'm pretty sure 2.5 half is a touch young to be 'boozin' it up' (It's in the parenting manual somewhere). And besides that I've already made up my mind that I will be one of those completely oblivious mothers that doesn't notice the clanging of glass in my son's backpack as he dashes out for a 'study date at the library'.

Not that, that would happen.

My kids are perfect.

Anyways, you probably want to know why my toddlers were at a kegger. That's reasonable. It's because Kevin's cousin just turned 30. So it was a family oriented party

With a keg.

And at least one person trying to drink themselves back in time. (Unsuccessfully I might... Sorry bud, you're still 30)

Oh yeah and the first kegger Sawyer attended? Well it all started 20 years ago when my in laws decided not to take 'family planning' very seriously and my husband ended up with siblings 9 and 10 years younger then him. So my children were born with a teenage aunt and uncle.

It makes for some interesting life experiences...

Day in the life

2010-05-11T15:19:00.000-07:00

3:40AM - My alarm goes off. Since I'm not even sure that's a real time, I hit snooze, hoping that when it goes off again, the clock will say something much more reasonable.. like noon or something.

3:49AM - It doesn't. I get out of bed anyway.

3:50AM - I pee, and check my email. That's right kids, I multi-task at 3:50am. Try not to compare yourself to me, we're all created different and that's not your fault.

3:51-4:25ishAM - I straighten my hair, and ears and whatever else gets in my way while I'm trying to perform this activity half asleep.

4:25-4:35AM - Apply make-up. Yeah it takes me 10 whole mins, but it's worth it... I clean up good ;)

4:35AM - I sniff my jeans to see if I can get another day out of them. It's rare that I can't.

4:36AM - I irritate the piss out of Kevin by bumping into, or stubbing my toe on everything in our bedroom, in an attempt to find my clothes and get dressed in the dark (you know, so I don't bother him).

4:45AM - I start looking for my keys.

4:55AM - I wake Kevin up to ask him if he's seen my keys.

4:55.5AM - He asks if they're on the kitchen table. I say that's the first place I looked.

4:50AM - I start stomping around the house and making aggravated noises.

4:51AM - Kevin gets out of bed and finds my keys on the kitchen table. I accuse him of planting them there just to make an ass out of me. He totally would too.

4:52-5:05 - I load the car with diaper bags, lunches and kids.

5:15 - I stop at Tim Horton's. Obvs! It's 5:15 *EH AM* and I'm Canadian.

5:30 - Arrive at the babysitters. You all know that story!

5:45AM - 2:30PM - Get berated and walked all over.

2:45PM - Arrive at babysitters and immediately start making empty promises to get my kids in the car.

3:05PM - Arrive at home and feel the wrath of my empty promises.

3:05PM - 8PM - Laundry, cleaning, cooking, ICarly watching, eating, baths.

Just kidding! Anyone who works full-time, with 2 toddlers who says they do all that is lying. Or a robot. Probably a robot.

8PM - 8:30PM - Convince Sawyer there's nothing to be afraid of in his room, and disappoint him repeatedly by telling him he can't sleep in Mommy and Daddy's room. That is apparently, the absolute worst news you can give a 2 year old.

8:30PM - Shower.

9PM - Sit down and spend some time with Kevin, because I like to run off at the mouth and say things like, "Without the love Kevin and I formed in the beginning, we wouldn't even have kids. So I feel like one of the greatest gifts we can give our kids is to take care of that relationship." And then people are all "Awww that's so true!" So I feel obligated to back it up by sitting in the same room as him while watching assorted forensic investigation shows <3. You're welcome kids!

10:30/11:00 - Stumble around the house just praying that I end up in bed before I fall asleep.

Now I want you to know that I'm not telling you this as an excuse for why I blog so infrequently. I'm telling you this for the pity and sympathy. Let me have. I mean really lay it on thick.

And use words like 'unbelievable', 'incredible' and 'sassy'

Thanks!

What?!?! None Of You Thought To Warn Me?

2010-05-05T16:00:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I just have to sit back and look in awe at my own stupidity.

Not only do I let myself think "I wish Sawyer wanted to stay with me instead of going to the babysitters!" I actually sit my ass down and WRITE IT DOWN FOR THE WHOLE FRICKIN WORLD TO SEE.

I mean, COME ON. Have I never heard the phrase 'be careful what you wish for???'

I was just BEGGING for that to come back and bite me in the ass. Really.

So NOW instead of him being psyched to have a fun day with friends and me feeling a sense contentment I have to push him off me, look him in those little blue eyes, while he's screaming and BEGGING me to stay and walk out the door.

Yeah that's way better IDIOT!

Then you know what that child does to me? Looks me right back in the eye when I pick him up and tells me that he doesn't want to go with me. He wants to stay.

Of course you do kid.

Because any other way would ease the guilt.

Paying the Price

2010-05-03T15:05:00.000-07:00

I just took out the garbage, which in and of itself, is newsworthy.

But it gets better.

As I'm hauling the bag out of the garbage can I happen to notice a cupcake. Upon closer inspection I find that there are, in fact, 3 cupcakes in the garbage.

Oh it get's even better...

ALL of the cupcakes have the icing and sprinkles gnawed of the top. TODDLER STYLE!

You may take this time to judge me for not keeping a closer eye on my child. I'll be spending the evening peeling him off the wall.

The Fastest Year Of My Life

2010-05-01T15:41:00.000-07:00

One year ago today we discovered that Sawyer had broken my camera.

We discovered it at 8:29am when we tried to use it to take a picture of his newborn baby brother.

Somehow, between that moment and today, a whole year disappeared.

Since Sean only started sleeping through the night like last week, most of this past year is a blur to me. Soooo instead of a long profound post about how having a second child has changed my life and how complete Sean has made me feel, I'm going to post a glimpse into his life thus far through photos.

Here's the photo we used to introduce Sean to facebook. MEANINGFUL!

They're all mine <3

The day Sean met his big cuz Gavin. I'm just going to have to go ahead and apologize now to all of you ladies out their having little girls... I can only hold these heartbreakers back for so long. They're going to be bigger then Bieber.

About a month after Sean was born a good friend (from Mandy Taggart Photography) took some professional shots of the fam. If you look closely at this one you can see the wet spot on the dark blanket where Sean peed.

If you look closely at this one, well ok, I guess you don't have to look that closely.

And this one? This one made up for all that....

Don't worry, he had his H1N1 immunizations before we threw him in there.

Soaking up the sun in Cuba. Don't hate him cuz you ain't him.

'What do you mean I got Daddy's hairline?'

And here he is today...

How if you`ll excuse me, I have to go cry myself to sleep over how fast they`re growing up.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SEAN! WE LOVE YOU!

A Revelation

2010-04-14T14:38:00.000-07:00

It has been brought to my attention that while I have found a couple reasons to keep Sawyer (he LIKES doing housework -maternity test pending- AND he thinks I'm a superhero), but not little Sean. So basically I'm looking for your best offer. I accept cash, credit and money order.

I kid. I kid.

I now realize why I've kept Sean around so long.

He loves me!

Don't get me wrong, Sawyer loves me, but he is a social animal. Every morning I take them to the sitter's and Sawyer waltzes in, throws his jacket on the ground and get's straight to being the life of the party. When I pick him up in the afternoon, I have to drag him away from his 3 year old friends, kicking and screaming.

Even once I've got him all settled at home with a little mountain of easter candy (don't judge me - I've got a 2 year old's love to win here), he still spends our precious few hours together asking when we're going back to the sitter's house.

But Sean, my sweet, little, baby Sean, balls his eyes out when I drop him off, then greets me with a huge smile and outstretched arms when I pick him up.

He knows how to treat a mommy right!

Now if you'll excuse me, I've got some changes to make on my will!

Sean's Got Moves!!

2010-04-09T18:30:00.000-07:00

I'm am absolutely not just posting this video, because going back to work has made me cranky and tired, and any post I made in this state would be uninteresting or illogical.

It's just too cute not to share!

Potty Training Tips

2010-04-06T15:03:00.000-07:00

Here are a list of things I've learned on our potty training journey. Hopefully these tips will help make your journey a little a bit smoother.

1) Do NOT buy cute little underpants with a large, colourful, appealing image on the rear. It will result in a very long, drawn out argument with your toddler about whether of not you have put these underpants on backwards. An argument that will lead your toddler to questions your capabilities as a caregiver, in turn causing an emotional breakdown in both parties, and finally ending in chronic bed wetting in one or both of you. Kind of counter productive, huh?

2)Do NOT allow your child to roam the house naked. Friends of ours insisted that the only way they were able to get their child to stop wetting his pants was to strip him down to his birthday suit and set him loose. Apparently it worked like a charm for them. I jumped all over this method. I was all like 'You mean he'll use the potty AND I won't have to go through the hassle of actually dressing my child?!?!? uhhh SCORE!!!" I don't know what I was thinking. I just hope that I actually FOUND all the little puddles.

3)DO sit down and have a lengthy discussion with your child about reducing the size of their carbon footprint. They're either filling up the dumps with their dirty diapers or wasting one of our non renewable resources with the 18 loads of laundry your doing everyday. And really, what toddler doesn't respond positively to a good healthy political debate?

4)And finally, corn does NOT break down in the digestive system. This is not so much a tip as a.. let's say... heads up.

DISCLAIMER: I have not, in fact, successfully potty trained any children. Although I have tried, unsuccessfully, on several occasions, so I will maintain that I am, in fact, an authority on the matter.

Happy Easter!!

2010-04-02T17:41:00.001-07:00

I have got some bad news for any moms out there that were holding out hope for a 'World's Greatest Mom' mug this Easter, because I totally swooped in and scooped that title this weekend.

I washed all our sheets and towels and hung them on the line to dry (we also turned off the bought air and opened all the windows... take THAT hydro bill), had a picnic lunch on the lawn with my family, and helped my son learn to ride his bike!

So that mug's mine ~~SUCKAS~~ almost as deserving fellow Mamas! Better luck next year!

There was only one little snag in our otherwise perfect day.

On our walk around the block Sawyer and I spotted a dead squirrel.

"What's that Mommy?"

"Don't worry about it hunny"

"That's the Easter Bunny!"

"Aw Jeez"

Image from http://everythingeaster.com

Happy Easter Everyone!!

Pardon Me?!?!?!

2010-04-01T14:43:00.000-07:00

So I glance over at Sawyer earlier this afternoon and the kid has his GAME FACE on.

Glazed over eyes.

Pursed lips

Clenched jaw.

Bright red face.

You know the look.

I'm forced to ask a question I don't really want the answer to, "Are you pooping bud?"

He snapped out of his trance, fixed his steely glare on me and announces...

"I need PRIVACY mommy!"

Well Sawyer, to that I say, you can poop without an audience when I can.

One of Those Days

2010-03-26T15:34:00.000-07:00

5 Months 16 Days 23 Hours 44 Mins until we're out of the terrible twos.

Keep the Change, Ya Filthy Animal!!

2010-03-25T18:38:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I wonder how I'm even able to stand upright. You know, without a spine and stuff.

Case in point...

Today I went to get a very overdue eyebrow wax. Like birds had taken up residence in the out of control nests over my eyes, kind of overdue.

That's not important to the story. Just makes for an interesting visual.

Anyways, so I'm right in the middle of having the hair ripped off my face when the waxer's friend waltzes into the room and strikes up a conversation. Which, leads to the total distraction of said waxer, leading her to DRIP HOT WAX INTO MY EYE?!?!?!

Uhhh lady? I don't think that goes there.

If you're anything like my sister, your immediate reaction to that is, 'I hope you didn't pay for that.'

Oh yes... I did.

'Eight bucks for the partial blinding? No Problem! Here's 10... keep the change!'

At least I can be thankful it was only my eyebrows I was waxing!

101 in 1001 Update #10

2010-03-24T13:55:00.000-07:00

I feel like since it's my TENTH update it should be somthing momentus. Like it should come with a huge giveaway, or like.. commerative t-shirts or something. That's actually really good... I'm going to keep that in mind for my 100th. I'd place your order now, I have a feeling the demand for these tees is going to be OUT OF CONTROL. Plus it's probably going to have a pic of me on it, and you don't want to miss the opportunity to proudly display my face on your chest.

I digress.

My tenth update will not include commemorative tees, but at least I actually accomplished some stuff. Which is good because it would've been pretty embarrassing to have nothing since I've been MIA for 3 weeks.

So without further ado...

44)Get a Drastic Haircut

I think this may have been a symptom of my quater life crisis, but it totally backfired because I ended up with 'Mom Hair'.

Long <strike>hair</strike> story short, I had long dark hair and then this happened....

and now I don't.

70)Win the Lottery

Now don't go making up stories about how we're distant relatives or old grade school buddies or whatever, because I already spent the $20.

On more lottery tickets.

Which I lost on.

79)Do Our Taxes on Time

Yes we did get a return and yes it is already spent.

On more lottery tickets.

Just kidding.

Kind of.

I'm actually pretty sure I've crossed something else off the list as well, but I'm so terrified of jinxing it that I'm going to have to refrain from bragging about it this week.

If you'd like to see the entire updated list you can find it HERE or over there -----> somewhere.

Actually

2010-03-22T04:13:00.000-07:00

Recently my husband let it slip to the family that I have a blog. Presumably because he was ~~looking for an easy out~~ bursting with pride and adoration. Since that time they have been dying to click over here and find I've made them famous by posting about them.

They haven't said as much, but they don't have to.

I can see it their eyes.

So here it is kids. You can thank me with gifts. Expensive ones.

My absolute favourite thing about my family knowing about my little corner of the internet is, without a doubt, their ability to work it into ANY conversation.

ME: Sean FINALLY cut a tooth.
Family Member: I know. I saw the post about it on your blog. He's having a rough time with it, eh?

Family Member #1: We got the kids some treats.
Family Member #2: Careful, you'll end up being blamed for childhood obesity! (Touche)

ME: How was your day?
Family Member: YOU HAVE A BLOG!!

They also thoroughly enjoy the deep shade of red my face turns when they tell anyone who will listen about the existence of this blog. And they ALWAYS follow up that revelation with the phrase, "It's ACTUALLY really good." Don't worry family, I'm not reading into your emphasize of the word ACTUALLY.

But in completely unrelated news, I will ACTUALLY be putting the money I planned to use for your birthday presents this year towards a ~~new laptop~~ good charity. Because I know you'd ACTUALLY like it that way! Your welcome!

Beautiful Blogger

2010-03-21T02:16:00.000-07:00

So while I had been gallivanting around ignoring my blog, I actually received a couple of awards from some awesome, much more dedicated, fellow bloggers. So I'm going to post about them one at a time... you know... cause I'm desperate for content.

So without further ado...

The first award is the Beautiful Blogger Award.

I was able to scam this award by not posting photos of myself on this blog. However, I'm going to frame it and put it up in the bedroom like I won a Miss Universe pageant, because of my strong performance in the swimsuit portion. Don't judge me.

This little confidence burst was sent over my way from Gnetch over at Thank Goodness For The Good Ones . Now I think that's an awesome title... she thinks it's too long. And possibly more suited to a porn site. If anything that fact is just leaving her room to grow! So do me a favour and go over there and tell her how awesome her blog title and CONTENT are. But be prepared to get pranked a time or to if you stick around :P

Of course, as with any good thing, there's a catch to this award. There's rules. I have to tell you 7 things you don't know about me and choose 7 fabulous bloggers to award this award.

So stick with me here guys...

Seven Things You Don't Know About Me

1)I have a little nick out of my left ear. My mother used to tell me that it's where the stork bit me. I know right?!? Too cute.

2)Following that theme, I also have a dent on my temple that's the result of the chicken pox. My Grandfather used to tell me it's because I was shot in the head and don't remember. I know right?!?! Little creepy Gramps.

3)We call boogers, piggies. I know it's only number 3 and I'm really struggling. My son is sitting in the corner picking his nose, I guess he's my muse.

4)I LOVE LOVE LOVE the musical stylings of Will Smith. And I mean LOVE. This white girl can make a total fool of herself rapping EVERY word to EVERY one of his songs.

5)My worst fear is of something bad happening to my kids. A close second is that the little girl from The Ring is real.

6)It has taken me LITERALLY weeks to finish this post, and I still had to cop out and use that as a point on the list.

Now it's time to give it up!

1)Jen @ My Inner Foodzilla This award goes not only to her, but also to her very well dressed pillow.

2)Connie @ ConnieDom She's off on some adventure for the month which gives you plenty of time to have a look around her place and prepare yourself for all the awesome she'll be bringing back with her.

3)Laura @ The Bignell Family Her family photos are ADORABLE and as if having cute kids isn't enough, she has Uncle Jesse doing the beach boys on blog playlist!

4)Lilly @ A Lil Story I live for her 'Not Me Monday' posts. I thought I had my hands full with my 2 boys. She has 3, 2 of which are TWINS! Makes for some fun reads!

5)Vic @ A Little Bit of Vic Her knack for finding great products has been a definite problem for my shopping addiction!

Alright that's all this award can suck out of me! It sure beat doing the laundry though!

Work Hard, Play Hard

2010-03-19T13:19:00.000-07:00

Last friday my boss called me all in a panic because my maternity leave had caused my place of business to crumble down around her, and only I could right the wrongs that had been done. Either that or they needed a little extra help and didn't want to hire and train a temp to work until I was due to return in less then a month.

She talks fast and I missed some of the finer details. It really could've been either.

But regardless of the reason why, she was asking me to return to work early, and was willing to work around my husband's schedule so the kids wouldn't have to go to daycare early. I'm not sure what was possessing me, maybe a desire to have adult conversations, or the fact that I had just gotten 4 new shirts I wanted to show off, but I agreed to return on a part time basis until my official return date.

Then I hung up the phone and balled my eyes out.

What was I thinking?? Sean's not even one yet!! That means he still has lots of firsts that I could potentially miss! I knew the day would come that I would have to return to work. It was either that or usher in the day where I have to tell the kids they can't play organised sports, or have decent clothes and fun toys, or eat. And they have just become too accustomed to that hoity, toity lifestyle. But I thought I had more time to emotionally prepare myself.

It became very clear that I hadn't emotionally prepared myself Tuesday evening when I realized that my FIRST day back would mean missing a FIRST in Sean's life.

Sean's FIRST St. Patrick's Day!!!! Cue the tears.

OK OK so I realize that St. Patrick's day is maybe not a holiday that's intended to be celebrated by 10.5 month olds. BUT I BOUGHT HIM A THEMED SHIRT!!! It's green and yellow and says 'Shamrock and Roll" and I didn't get to put it on him. Not only that but I didn't even get to SEE it on him until 5 in the afternoon. Had I been properly celebrating this beautiful holiday I wouldn't even have been able to see straight by then!

Alas, such is the life of a working mom. Right now I have to make the most of the time we all have together until I'm running that company and can use my big, fat pay cheques to BUY their love.

Apologies, Excuses and Stomach Contents

2010-03-15T12:34:00.000-07:00

I know you've heard it all from me before.

I have a really good reason.

I can change. I WILL change.

I mean it this time.

I know you feel like you're setting yourself up for disappointment by putting your trust in me again.

I understand and together we can mend the wound I've left you with.

One.Post.At.A.Time.

Because I am for real this time back in the game.

Here are my ~~excuses~~ reasons I found it acceptable to make it to march 15th and only have 2 posts for the month.

1) My children look like this...

(Oh get off your high horse. I HAD to take a pic of my sick child because he looked so.freaking.cute.)

This, of course, is Sean, but Sawyer is sporting a very similar look made even sadder with the addition of his stomach contents running down his chin and jammies.

*That picture alone wasn't enough to guilt you in to forgiving me? Have you no soul?? Fine...

2)For whatever reason I got it into my head that I HAD to post a 101 update before anything else. And since that post has to include a picture of my haircut, and I don't have time for such trivial things as, 'looking acceptable', I could not possibly create that post. Thankfully however, I realized that no one is really interested in those posts but me, and have decided that it's ok for me to write about something else until my next good hair day. Rest assured though, that those updates WILL return.

And so concludes my extensive list of reasons I've slacked off.

Now stop pretending your mad at me and give me a little looooove!

I'm Back

2010-03-09T17:58:00.000-08:00

Well I got a new laptop.

Kind of.

I got one of those little ~~piles of crap~~ mini laptops.

From a bulk mini laptop store.

On ebay.

For $100.

So you know. YOU KNOW. I've acquired myself a fine piece of machinary here.

I got it in red in hopes that a unique colour would make it seems more trendy and... stuff.

Trust me when I say NO ONE will make that mistake.

Oh well, at least I'm back.

R.I.P. Mac

2010-03-03T10:50:00.000-08:00

My husband thought that I should let everyone know why my blog has SUCKED lately. This is how he phrased it.. 'You should let your fans know where you are!' He's delightful :P

So where I have been is... without a computer. My 'son' (we're waiting on the maternity test) spilled a coffee on my laptop. Oh yes he did. And when I took it to the repair shop to see if there was anything that could be done, the kind gentlemen praised me on my coffee choice based on the computer's aroma then told me I was effed.

Basically I've got myself a really expensive air freshener. Thanks Sean.

So I'm going to have to ask you to bear with me for a little while til I get back up and running. I'll try to make it worth the wait!

Happy Birthday to Me!!!!!!

2010-02-22T18:16:00.000-08:00

Sorry I haven't been around much! I've been super busy with it being my BIRTHDAY friday and all. I'm going to go ahead and assume you all didn't forget and that my super awesome, expensive, sparkly gift is in the mail. Awww thanks.... you shouldn't have!

So like I said I've been soooo busy this weekend, seeing as my birthday brought along with it, what is commonly referred to as a 'quarter life crisis'. It probably doesn't help that my husband had made it his personal mission to pump me up for this momentous occasion by drilling it into my head that 25 is the year that I OFFICIALLY become a cougar. Sorry ladies... he's taken.

He thought he was pretty hilarious until he remembered that a cougar is woman who is on the prowl for hot, energetic, eager, young men....

Who's laughing now hunny?!?!

ME-OW!!!

101 in 1001 Update #9

2010-02-18T20:03:00.000-08:00

I was desperate to not have to come up with yet ANOTHER clever way to confess that I'd had another disappointing week, so I went and tried something drastic. A whole day with no time outs (#93), then my sister reminded me that I had...

94)Visit(ed) a family member when it's not a family function.

Thank goodness - "Sawyer stop licking your feet or you're going to time out....1......2.....3 timeout!"

But yeah...

Just yesterday we had a playdate with my cousin-in-law and her oh so handsome son Adam. I have to say I was shocked to see how much this little dude has come out his shell since the last time we saw him! In visits past he could've taken Sean in a "Mommy Suckie" competition, and Sean takes that title VERY seriously. But this visit he was Mr. Social and I was even able to scam some snuggles! SCORE!

Now you're going to have to induldge me and look at pics of my handsome men and their handsome second cousin, once removed? I think?

Oh and OF COURSE the batteries were dead in my camera. So I'mma go ahead and give credit where it's due.... Photos By Lisa :)

Oh yeah... You can see the original list HERE and over there ------> (somewhere)

A Little Birdie Told Me...

2010-02-16T08:03:00.000-08:00

Well I went and got myself a twitter account.

Image from: www.wpdone.com/.../ practika-twitter-bird.png

I figured since it's only so long before I become an internet sensation, I might as well start acting like a celebrity! Plus, it turns out the idea of stalking ~~real~~ other celebrities from the comfort of my couch is very appealing to me.

Anywho.... if your dream is to know about every breath I take then your dreams have come true (yeah I'm going to be that kind of tweeter (tweeter?? Is that the right term?))

Skunks Got Stink, My Kids Got Cute

2010-02-12T16:30:00.000-08:00

My kids are cute.

Sometimes that's the only reason we're all able to come out the other side of the day in one piece.

For example...

Today I discovered that Sawyer's first language is not, in fact, english, but whining. AND he had decided to use his influence as a big brother to teach Sean the beauty of this ancient language. Mommy needs ~~vodka~~ earplugs.

Then when I was taking out the garbage and desperately trying to resist the urge to take them out with it, Sawyer waltzes over to me and says, "Hi SuperMommy".

Right then and there I decided to keep him, because I know, I KNOW he said it because he appreciates all the little things I do for him everyday and felt that I truly deserved the title. It was absolutely NOT because one of his favourite cartoon characters had become a caped crime fighter, seemingly by just adding super to the front of his name.

There may be hope for my kids yet, I mean, they DO have a SuperMommy!

101 in 1001 Update #8

2010-02-11T05:25:00.000-08:00

Not only did I not do a thing off the list this week... I also forgot to write the update?? For shame!!

So I decided that it was time to really buckle down and replace #47 (Remember number fourty seven? and the trouble I've had replacing it?)

So here it is...

Are you ready for it?

I hope your psyched because this is going to be LEGON-

And I hope none of you are lactose intolerant because the last part of that word is.....

DAIRY!!!! (In case you're wondering, YES Barney Stinson is going to be my second husband! I can change him!!)

#47)Be the SITS feature blogger

So for anyone that doesn't know SITS (The Secret's in the Sauce) is an online community of wonderful supportive ladies that come together everyday to show a little love through blog comments. And just to keep it interesting every week day the founders of SITS (Tiffany and Heather) choose a featured Blogger to bask in the glow of comment love.

I WANT THAT LOVE!!!

So here's the plan. I'm going to wait a little while, get a few more quality posts under my belt and then I'm going to start emailing those poor women until they have no choice other then to block me. That's where you come in... If you all send requests for me, they'll be all like

"Well we didn't find her interesting... but maybe she's an acquired taste? Whatever... we'll just give her day so we can lift the restraining order."

And I'll be all like'

"They love me!! I'm awesome!!!"

Sometimes my genious astounds even me!

So in all seriousness SITS is a really kick ass community of some really kick ass ladies! So if you haven't already, get over there and make yourself some SITSTAS!

An Open Letter To Sean's Teeth

2010-02-09T09:21:00.000-08:00

Sean's Teeth,

I'm not going to mention that you're so late, I'm not even sure why you bothered to show up.

Or that there should be like 4 or 5 by now and only 1 of you is making it's way in.

I'm writing this to let you know you need to stop bullying my baby! He's trying to be a big, tough guy and not mention anything, but I can see how much what you're doing is getting to him. He just wants to sleep all day and when he's awake he's grouchy and irritable. He's so upset by your complete disregard for his well being that he's made him self sick and feverish. You should be ashamed.

I want you to know that the choices you make have consequences and right now Sean is dealing with those consequences. But EFF.WHY.EYE. if you don't ease up on him, I'll make sure you're the one dealing with those consequences! And ~~I have no idea how~~ you don't want to know how!

Oh and tell all your little buddies to get their butts in gear so we can get this all over with!

Anyways, I hope you're doing well!

Sean's Exhausted Mommy

Pretty Sure They're Conspiring Against Me

2010-02-05T09:26:00.000-08:00

So I just finished lowering the mattress in Sean's crib. I know what you're thinking, I should of done this months ago because one night I'll stroll in to his room and finding him standing up in his crib moments away from proving the size of his 'kahunas' by throwing himself over the edge of the crib rail and yeah I'd get there in time to save him but the damage will have already have been done and I'll be so paranoid that I'll tuck him into bed with us and that will suck cause he's a bed hog!

Dude, you totally think in some SERIOUS run on sentences.

Anyways it's funny that you would think that because that is EXACTLY how my night went. Weird.

At first it was all sweet snuggles like when he was a little baby, but it quickly turned into me teetering on the very edge of the bed by one butt cheek. So you know, that was a good night sleep.

So then around 6:30 the little bugger wakes up and I frantically do whatever it takes to get him back to sleep, because at 7 Kevin gets up for work and then I can sneak onto his side of the bed.

Enter Sawyer. Literally.

He claims he had a nightmare. Fine.

Kevin graciously gets out of bed early so that we'll all fit. Fine.

I get all snuggled up under the covers FINALLY. Way more then fine.

Sawyer says 'Aww Sean sleeping' and POKES him awake?? Not fine, kid! NOT FINE.

Long story short, if you're looking for me, I'll be the one with the bags under her eyes desperately trying to force my kids to nap. Wish me luck!

101 in 1001 Update #7

2010-02-03T20:03:00.000-08:00

So I did absolutely nothing this week. At first I was all bummed out and then I was all like "Dude that means I don't have to write a long post." Which was good cause we PVR'd LOST and it meant I could sit back and enjoy it.

ENJOY?!?!

I forgot what watching Lost is like. Ugh, this show makes me crazy!

Want to see everything I didn't get done this week? Find the original list HERE of as always, over there ----> somewhere

Over The Top

2010-02-01T18:23:00.000-08:00

Where's my blog?

OVER THE TOP!

But don't take my word for it.... check out my shiny FIRST EVER award!

Awarded to me by the gorgeous Ms Vic over at A Little Bit of This. After you read this you are going to want to swing by her place and leave her some love, let me tell you why. Ms V writes straight from the heart. If she's happy, sad, angry or frustrated that's what you're going to get out of her blog.. she's the real deal kids. And besides all that she's someone you're going to want on your side. Not only does she take a little time everyday to leave some love for her blog peeps, she knows how to handle an anonymous commentor. Just saying.

Now it my understanding that this award comes with some responsiblities. It wants to know what makes me happy... specifically my top 10 happy makers. No problem.

They are, in no particular order;

MY KIDS - Here's the part where I go all sappy mommy on your ass'. Everyday I thank the powers that be that Kevin and I changed our minds about having kids. Sawyer and Sean are, without a doubt, the greatest things I've ever had a part in. The are the smartest, funniest, handsomest, charmingest kids to ever grace this universe with their presence. Don't worry, your kids are like a close second. ;)

MY HUSBAND - Bet you didn't see that coming. I try to be that strong, independent, has it all together Mom that can run her house like clockwork while making cookies in her high heels or whatever, but somehow I always seem to be in need of rescuing. Like the time I got the gas cap stuck in our car and needed him to come all the way out to the gas station so I could fill our tank. He came rolling around the corner before I even had a chance to hang up the phone, popped the cap out, kissed me goodbye and jumped back in his truck. As if it was perfectly normal and not at all inconvenient to have to come all the way to a gas station to apply a little elbow grease to a gas cap. Plus he looks like this...

Hubba Hubba

3) So we've covered my kids and my husband so what's the obvious third? CHIPS. I could eat chips ALL DAY LONG if they wouldn't clog my arteries and make me 400lbs. Why must the best things in life be so bad for you.

4) Of course my wonderful FRIENDS. Not to get all serious on you here, but one thing I've noticed about being a mom is that it can really make you lose yourself. My friends remind that while being Mommy is a huge part of my life there's a little bit more to me! Plus they're like, totally hot!

5) ICarly - Don't judge me. That shit's hilarious!

6) MY FAMILY - Kevin and I are very lucky to be very close (not necessarily geographically close) to both our families. Sawyer and Sean mean the world to their grandparents, aunts and uncles and I know that they're going to be better men for it.

7) DAYDREAMING - I spend so much of my time up in the clouds sometimes it takes me a minute to remember that I'm NOT actually a millionaire, living in a huge mansion with a butler, cook and housekeeper (yet) and so, yes I do have to do the laundry. Ugh... sometimes reality blows.

8) THE BABY FROM THE E-TRADE COMMERCIALS - That kids like what? One? One and half? Sawyer's well over 2 and a half and hasn't made a cent off the stock market! What am I doing wrong?!?! WHAT?

9)PHOTOGRAPHY - I really, really wish I had figured this out at 18 but whatevs. Inventory control is totally ~~sucking the life out of me~~ just as fulfilling.

10) MY BLOG - Seemed kinda mandatory to add this to a list on said blog. Plus it's kick ass.

Man, for a minute there I didn't think I was going to make it out the other side of that list. But here we are. So the second responsibility is to pass this bad boy on to some other "Over the Top Bloggers"

No problem!

Randelle - She's hanging out at 'A Simple Kinda Life'. As of right now she's mostly blogging about her '101 in 1001' list, but maybe if you all head over there and leave a little love she'll start up the 'Make-Up Monday' segment she's been threatening to start. The girl can do MAGIC with a makeup brush.

Angie - The title of her blog says it all. Mom to QT's and they so are. She's got the million dollar family, a 2 and a half year old little boy and a 3 month old little angel girl. And just because raising a toddler and newborn aren't enough of a challenge, she's a WAHM and she's blogging about 2 BIG challenges ('101 in 1001' and the 365 project) and just to really rub it in... she always looks glamorous doing it. Try not to hate on her! hehe

Kandice - I've lead you over to her Photography Blog before. If you weren't hanging around then; first of all, I'm glad you've seen the light and you're here now. Second of all go check it out! She, and the adorable babies she photographs will rock your socks off. But she has a personal side too! So go check out Wait! It's All About The Numbers and follow her journey from fab mommy to smaller fab mommy. And while you're over there click on the little Top Mommy Button at the bottom of her page and sky rocket her to number one.

Last but not least... Delena - So far her blog has been about her ~~love/hate realationship with sleep~~ pregnancy, but literally any minute now it's going to be about her ~~love/hate relationship with sleep~~ transition into motherhood. So head over to Who Really Knows What's Next and be there right from the first breath.

So that's it kids. If anyone else wants it go ahead and swipe it. I totally meant to give you one anyway!

P.S. Yeah I know I didn't post yesterday, so starting today....

Major Suckage

2010-01-31T18:31:00.000-08:00

Hey, you remember that time we got in a car accident because the city doesn't salt the damn roads?

I do. It was yesterday.

And here's why it sucked;

1) It was a car accident

2) I'm a total hypochondriac and so when Sean cried after we hit the car OF COURSE it was because he had been seriously injured and NOT because two cars making contact is a touch noisy. It was a little fender bender.

3) Insurance companies SUCK, and ours even has the balls to not take claims on weekends. You know because car accidents don't happen on weekends. No wait, yeah they do........ apparently.

4) The gentleman in the back seat of the car we slid into, with the bloodshot eyes, emerged from the smoke billowing out of their can to inform us that he had whiplash. Of course.

5) WE WERE LATE FOR MY NEPHEW'S FIRST BIRTHDAY! GRRRR!!

So basically if you had an accident planned for yourself or a loved one.... seriously give some thought to calling it off. THEY SUCK.

Christmas in January - Don't Hate

2010-01-30T14:46:00.000-08:00

Well I've started my Christmas shopping.

Yes I do have a calendar. Why? Were you looking to pick me up a little something? A calendar would be nice, I guess. I should tell you though that I'm in the market for a new pair of shoes. Recently the sole of my L.A.M.B. shoes just fell right off. UGH annoying! I loved those shoes and besides that I once saw a picture of Paris Hilton checking the same pair of shoes (in white) at LAX. I wonder if the sole fell off her shoes?!

I digress.

The malls have some FAN-TAS-TIC sales on all their winter stuff right now. And so being the ~~shopaholic~~ super well prepared, got it all together mom I am I picked up some clothes and pj's.

Well that's it! That's the whole story. You want me to blog every day that's the quality of work you're going to receive. No one said life was fair.

New House Fever

2010-01-29T13:48:00.000-08:00

I have a MAY-JOR case of house fever. What?! That's a totally legit medical term. I know it is because I googled it, and if it wasn't real I wouldn't have been able to find THIS or THIS. Please don't question my integrity again mmkay?

Seriously ALL I THINK ABOUT is getting a new house! I spend all day on MLS either looking at houses that are way more then we can afford and finding flaws with them. Or looking up houses in our neighbourhood and listing reasons why their houses SUCK and ours could sell for like $100 000 more then they've listed theirs for. So you know, real productive.

This morning I approached Kevin with my desire to upgrade our current living conditions, hoping my fever was contagious.

It is not.

APPARENTLY we have a lot more work to do on our little home and APPARENTLY since he does all of the handy work and renovations he gets to set the timeline for when that work will be finished and APPARENTLY a week and half is unreasonable.

Whatevs. I'm going to go try and sleep this fever off.

Operation Name Change

2010-01-28T17:59:00.000-08:00

Did you ever watch the show Alias?

You totally should. Besides being an action packed, sexy, witty, thrill ride, it's also where Bradley Cooper got his start. Yeah... the hottie from The Hangover.

I have a reason for bringing all this up. Well 2 reasons. One was just so I could post a pic of Bradley Cooper. Your Welcome.

The second reason is that lately I've been giving a lot of thought to removing my kids names from my blog and giving them (and Kevin and I) alias'. As of right now our last name is need to know (and you don't need to know) and our location is totally top secret.

So is giving us alias' a little over the top? Normally I'd say yes, but my kids are REALLY cute. Like way above average.

So what's holding me back? ~~Laziness~~ Time constraints. Giving them alias' means going back through all 42 of my previous posts and changing ours names. Ugh.

So I'm torn.

Would you be more inclined to read a blog about Sawyer and Sean or Monkey and Booger?

Oh oh....
And this guys was on Alias too.

Right?!?!

101 in 1001 Update #6

2010-01-27T21:49:00.000-08:00

What did I cross off the list this week.....?

26) Get Drunk

And you thought I had no life outside my kids. Well I don't, but every once in a while my fabulous friends get sick of me saying things like "I have to go potty' or complaining about my ouchies, and insist on taking me out to do grown up things.

This week's grown up thing was heading out to the bar. For the first time in 3 years. Why yes, I am that cool.

You'd think that crossing this particular item off the list would come with some awesome material, but mostly it was just some great girl time.

We laughed, danced and got hit on a little. What more can you ask for!

**BONUS** I wasn't the only to cross something off my 101 list that night... keep an eye on THIS BLOG for an update on her list. Plus I hear you may get some of the dirty details from her anniversary celebrations ;) ENJOY

You know the drill... updated list HERE or over there ---->

April Showers bring..... FAN-FREAKIN-TASTIC Blog Designs

2010-01-27T10:14:00.000-08:00

So you'll all remember that about a month ago I packed up all my stuff and moved from wordpress to blogger.

I believe I was partially honest and admitted that it was because I am shallow and wanted more freedom to beautify my blog. While that is the truth there is, as there always is, more to the story.

I had stumbled upon April of April Shower's Blog Design and had fallen truly, madly and deeply in love (with her designs? with her? It's all a blur). I couldn't keep my feelings all bottled up any longer and sent her an email, only to find this heartbreaking reply in my inbox hours later...

Hey Katherine!

Sadly I'm only able to install Blogger designs! I wish I knew how to do wordpress though! If you are able to install say, a header, by yourself then I could totally design something for you. It's just the "install" part that I don't know how to do!

April Durham

Please visit my site at
www.aprilshowersblogdesign.com

So I moved to blogger... was it creepy and obsessive ? ~~Absolutely~~ I don't think so! What choice did I have?

Well since then I've been pinching my pennies and ~~stalking~~ occasionally checking in on her blog and facebook fan page,

You're probably wondering why I'm telling you all this. It's because this morning I received the answer to my prayers.... an April Showers giveaway!

If she gets to 400 facebook fans before Friday, January 29th at 5pm MT she will give away TWO $100 gift certificates to TWO lucky winners!

So get your ass over there and become a fan! Then head over to her site and start dreaming big blog design dreams.

But if I catch you giving me some competition on the contest... we're going to have some words. All I'm saying!

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE LET ME WIN!!!!!!

Love Hurts

2010-01-26T17:45:00.000-08:00

Before I met my husband I dated a few guys. Nothing serious, And I was able to avoid ever being dumped.

I met Kevin at 19 and was married at 21. The past 5 years we've been together have been wonderful. Being with him makes me feel safe, strong and beautiful!

Basically, I thought I had avoided feeling the gut wrenching pain of a boy breaking my heart.

Until tonight.

My sweet, golden haired little angel, announced (upon being tucked into bed against his will) "No love you Mommy'

Ugh, I feel nauseous :S

Starting Today....

2010-01-25T09:26:00.001-08:00

What you thought I was serious about blogging everyday for 30 days?

That was just a ~~complete fail~~ drill. You know, to make sure you can handle all my awesomeness.

Feel like you're prepared.

Alright, starting today (mondays are better day to start things of this nature anyway) I will blog everyday day for a month. Your welcome.

In other news? I think I felt a tooth in Sean's mouth! Finally!

For months, every time Sean's gone into one of his diva-esque fits, someone would make the announcement... 'He must be teething', and I would swell with pride. Growing his very own teeth?? This proves it... he's a genius! He's going to be a doctor you know... going to cure cancer, and alzhiemers, and male pattern baldness!

Then a few weeks would pass with out any further signs that we could start adding steak to his menu. I would be struck with the realization that it was probably just gas... again.

Until this morning.

He's probably a few years away joining the research department at Rogaine, but I'm pretty sure I felt a tooth!

However this means I will be abondoning my work on baby dentures. My apologies!

P.S. Don't hate on my digital doodling

Why I've Decided to Keep My Children. Well, Sawyer At Least.

2010-01-22T07:18:00.000-08:00

This morning I went into Sawyer's bedroom to wake him up, only to find him sitting on the floor cleaning up all the lego off his floor? Really? MY son?

I waited until he was finished and then went to zipper up his lego bag. Then I heard his little voice.... 'One more Mommy?' He had found another one and was ASKING PERMISSION to put it away.

Seriously where did he get that from??

This isn't the first time he's managed to amaze and confuse me all with one action.

When he's in the bath he uses his wash cloth to wash around the rim of the tub. He even lifts all the shampoo bottles to clean to the tub underneath them, then WIPES THE BOTTOM of the bottle before he puts it back down.

Trust me when I say he's never seen me do that!

Fact is I actually have a half dozen empty bottles lined up around the bath to

cut down on visible surface area and thus, time spent cleaning.

Then, just yesterday, I was able to bribe him into taking a picture with me by telling him he could wipe down the coffee table if he did. Ummm, SCORE?!?!

Suddenly the reason people have children is coming into focus.

Child Labour.

Perched Upon My Throne

2010-01-21T13:19:00.000-08:00

Ugh whose bright frickin' idea was it to post every day?!?!

This sucks!

But I made a commitment and I'm going to follow through.

I said I wanted to be able to make more thought provoking posts soooooo........

Sometimes I blog from the toilet.

I bet that'll be provoking your thoughts for a while!

New Frontier

2010-01-20T13:52:00.000-08:00

I so long to be one of those bad ass bloggers that have something witty and interesting to blog about every-DAMN-day.

No I'm not bitter, why do you ask?

I wake up every morning with ambition and drive. I've got the power of 6 hours of interrupted sleep on my side and I'm ready to go! The world is my oyster!

I go to bed dreaming about the hilarious, heartwarming, thought provoking posts I'm going to write that will take the world by storm and make me a household name.

In between those 2 periods I fill my days by staring blankly at my computer screen, catching up on the afore mentioned bad ass bloggers and comtemplating whether on not to get a twitter account.

Oh yeah, I squeeze a bit of parenting in there where I can. Whatever.

Anyways... I've decided that practice makes perfect and that the only way I'm going to be able to get to a point where I have something good to write everyday is to just write every day!

Coincidentally, if I can keep it up for a month I can cross #49 off my list! You like apples?

So here goes.... everyday for a month.

What does this mean for "This Or The Housework". It means LOTS more top tens, possibly the invention of 'Sean Sundays' where I set him loose on my computer and let him come up with the post of the day, and most likely some very harsh reviews of the newest season of 'The Backyardigans'.

Hang on to your hats homies, it's going to be a bumpy ride.

Oh yeah, wondering about where to find those bad ass bloggers? Too bad. You just keep reading mine and be happy for the opportunity.

101 in 1001 Update #5

2010-01-17T09:22:00.000-08:00

Just so you know I have a very good reason for missing the last couple wednesdays, and for doing an update on a Sunday. I was busy crossing numero quatro off the list...

4) Take a trip out of the country.

I will now summarize the completion of this item with the use of point forms.

*My boys and my handsome nephew took it upon themselves to entertain the passengers on our

flight by taking turns screaming at the top of their lungs, puking on me and pushing the call button.

*Sean and had an unfavourable reaction to the food. I'll leave the details vague, but I will say that I was wiping stuff out of Sean's hair that had no place being there. Nothing to see here.

*Sawyer experienced his first ever sunburn (Mother of the Year here). And the worst part? It didn't even turn into a tan.

*Our second (or third, all the days melt into each other on vacation) day in, Cuba experienced it's coldest day in over 75 YEARS. Naturally.

*We met a delightful older couple that took it upon themselves to announce to my family that I had 'a glow' and went as far as to say that this September my in laws would be welcoming their first Granddaughter into this world. This, of course, caused my family to celebrate my afore mentioned unfavourable reaction to the food as proof that Kevin and I had, in fact, lost our minds and were on our way to having children even closer together then Sawyer and Sean. I assure you that we were not the ones who had lost their minds in this tale ;)

But in all honesty we had an amazing time! Cuba was beautiful and so was the company! We were sad to see the week come to an end!

Want to see the list in it's entirety? Check it out HERE or follow the link over on the right --->

You Know You're A Mom When...

2009-12-31T11:02:00.000-08:00

You shower with 3 rubber ducks, a rubber octopus, a rubber crab, a plastic scuba diver, a submarine and a book, because putting them all away would cut into your shower time.

And shower time is MOMMY TIME!

101 in 1001 Update #4

2009-12-30T09:45:00.000-08:00

You didn't think I forgot, didja?

I can't believe I've been at this for 4 whole weeks. That's like 3.5 weeks longer then I thought I'd make it!

Here it is......

82) Fit into size 6 jeans

My younger sister is a dedicated follower of this blog, and as such, is very familiar with my list. So this year she took advantage of this knowledge to pick some fab Christmas gifts. I got Alice in Wonderland (it's on my list of books to read), and a pair of size 6 jeans.

I've been sporting a size 10 since shortly after I created life the first time. So I - WAS - FLOORED when those puppies just slipped on.

If you had asked me 8 months ago if I thought I would ever think of breast feeding as a blessing, I would've wiped the tears from my eyes and the blood from my nipples and answered you with some sort of profanity.

Oh how far I've come.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

As always you can find the list HERE and there <------- (on the sidebar under the header '101 in 1001')

My Sincerest Apologies

2009-12-29T07:53:00.000-08:00

I can't believe how insensitive I've been.

Here I go announcing my plans to venture into a mall on CHRISTMAS EVE, and I didn't come back to report that I managed to get out alive?

I can only imagine that you were so consumed with fear over my well being that you couldn't enjoy the holidays!

Well let me put your mind at ease so you can enjoy ringing in the New Year. I survived.

I also survived my first ever Boxing Day shopping excursion.

Boy was I excited to learn that the Christmas get together my Grandpa hosts every year on Boxing Day had been moved to New Years Day. The opening in my schedule meant I would be free to take advantage of the mind blowing deals I'd heard so much about all these years.

I'd been looking forward to this day for 24 years, so 2 near accidents and a half an hour search for a parking spot didn't bother me. On the contrary, it fueled my excitement. If people were willing to face manslaughter charges to get a parking spot 15 miles from the mall, the deals must be incredible!

I was on cloud 9 as a strolled through the front door of that mall. I couldn't wait to get at those deals. In my head I could already see myself going home with my purchases. Hanaging up my new wardrobe while my husband hung up his new big screen t.v. No biggie.

Let me tell you a thing or two about Boxing Day shopping.

IT'S - A - SCAM.

All the same signs were up from our Christmas Eve shopping adventure, except instead of saying 'Holiday Special' they now read 'Boxing Day Special'.

I walked out of the mall purchase-less and feeling dirty and used.

I can't wait to do it all again next year!

101 in 1001 Update#3

2009-12-23T09:17:00.000-08:00

OH-EM-GEE!

I can't believe it's frickin' wednesday already!

I'm so upset I'm channeling my 15 year old self to try and get my point across.

Another week, another EPIC fail. Of course.

I just poured over the list trying to find something I could quickly knock off the list and... once again... EPIC fail.

Then I remembered #47. Sweet, forgiving #47.

I still haven't come up with something to replace #47.

The heavens opened and a new #47 floated down and smacked me in the head.

47) Have a week where you do nothing off the list.

Oh wait...

Completing this would mean crossing it off the list and then I haven't really completed it so I have to uncross it, but then I'm back to having completed it. Cross it off... SH*T.

So basically, to sum up this week, not only did I NOT cross a thing of this list but I still haven't replaced #47.

Which means this week is an... all together now.... EPIC fail.

And with that last use of the word EPIC I will return to my 24 year old self and get my butt in gear for next week.

It's About Time You Got Here

2009-12-22T07:23:00.000-08:00

For weeks I've been going back and forth on whether or not to make the switch from Wordpress to Blogger. A quick consult from google informed that this switch is absolutely THE WORST thing a human being can do. It's illogical and ignorant and here I am. In the end my vanity conquered my sense of logic and I made the switch.

So here we are. All my posts made the cut but due to some translating issues comments did not. Regardless, I'm happy to be settling in over here at Blogger.

I have to say though, the moving process meant lots of trip back to Wordpress and I couldn't help but feel a tinge of guilt every time I snuck back in there to pick up a link. Wordpress gave me 2 and a half of the greatest months of my life and I'll forever be grateful, but we're not the same people/blog hosting programs we were.

I can't change that.

All I can do is move on with my life and hope WP does the same.

So I'm saying goodbye to Wordpress, but hopefully not to the people that took a few mins out of their day to hang out with me there.

Come on in and join my in the dark side that is.... BLOGGER.

Oops! I Did It Again

2009-12-19T19:57:00.000-08:00

Jeez if I'm not careful this blog is just going to be is a series of disappointing '101 in 1001' updates.

You deserve more.

But I'm here on more pressing matters. The little calendar on the bottom of my screen claims it's the 19th?

For real?

Only 6 days until Christmas and I still have a mile long list of things to do to make sure my children remember this time of the year as the best frickin time of their lives. Yes, I realize their 2 years old and 7 months old, and won't remember this time of the year next month let alone in 30 years when they're doing this all with their families, but I really don't see how that's any of your business.

Somehow this happens to me every year. I started shopping in July! Literally in July. But between being over excited and giving people their presents early and my tendency to overdue things just a tad, a Christmas eve payday will see me fighting the crowds at the mall.

I am particularly excited for this trip because I had nothing better to do that day. You know except for wrapping all my presents (which includes a tradition brought to me by my in-laws of wrapping all the stocking stuffers), driving 2 hours to my uncle's house for Christmas eve dinner and of course driving 2 hours home to open christmas eve presents and get our milk and cookies ready so Santa doesn't jip us.

So I'm going to have to make a plea to all of you. Please, please be the responsible, considerate parents I dream of someday being and get all your Christmas shopping done by the 23rd.

I really don't want to end up on Santa's naughty list, but I'll do what I have to, to survive Christmas eve at the mall.

101 Things Update #2

2009-12-16T19:54:00.000-08:00

I know what you're thinking. No posts for a whole week, she must've been checking things off that list like mad.

And of course you're wrong.

Are you ready for the excuses to come rolling in?

Too bad here they are.

My kids are sick. Meaning that something slimy is oozing out of every orifice in their body and apparantly it is part of my motherly duties to wipe said slime in a timely matter, before it turns into a crunchy coating. They should tell you about that when you sign up for this parenting thing.

We have already begun our Christmas celebrations. We went to my Aunt-in-law's (real term?) place on sunday where my cousin-in-law got all dressed as Santa, complete with a sac full of presents so that Sawyer could cower in the corner furthest from him, Sean could stare blankly at him and my nephew could discover his deep rooted fear of heavy set men with beards and spend the afternoon screaming and balling everytime he was brought near the poor guy. But, have no fear, they bought the suit so we will have another chance to do this all again next year.

I actually have one less goal to achieve then I did last week. Before I made this list my hubby and I had agreed to replace our broken stove instead of having it repaired because we couldn't justify the cost of repairs. That was until we accidentally had a service call. A little while ago Kevin did the cable for an appliance repair shop and when he ran our stove woes by the owner he seemed to know exactly what the problem was and booked us a service call. We were still pretty set on a new stove so we were going to cancel the appointment, but being the responsible young adults we are, it slipped our minds. Which of course means the gentlemen showed up when our kitchen was at it's messiest and we were in our pjs. Long story short the long 6 months we've spent without a working stove has come to an end. Which also means so have my excuses for needing to order pizza. Thaaaaanks stove guys :(

But don't write me off just yet. I was able to put a line through #97;

97)Tip a great server 100%

That's right, at Christmas time and everything. I am BALLIN'. Sure the bill was only $7.29. And sure the server probably thought I was pretentious for giving her exactly $7.29. But you guys are counting on me! I had to cross something off the list! The things I do for you guys.

So that's all for this week. Except that I would like to replace #47. Sure I could run out and get the kids a little toy stove so that I could cross it off, but I can't bring myself to cheapen our relationship like that. So any ideas of a new goal?

101 Things Update #1

2009-12-09T19:47:00.000-08:00

Well ladies and gentlemen, it's been one whole week since I posted the list and so it's time for an update. Here, in no particular order, are the items I was able to cross off my list in the past week;

66)Finish this list in one day.

If your struggling at all to believe that I actually did this please go back and note the dramatic decrease in sass as the list goes on. By the time I had made this goal I had virtually lost the will to go on. In a desperate attempt to make this dream a reality I asked my husband for help in coming up with 35 more goals. He has always known this blog exists but never really had any interest in checking it out until I explained this list to him. Thursday morning I sent him the link to my blog and took Sean out to do some Christmas shopping. When I came home I experienced the fallout.

Him:I read your blog, you're a good writer.

Me:Thanks. Wait, did you read the whole blog or just the list?

Him:The whole thing.

Me:Oh.

Him:I couldn't understand all the references to the hot sauce until I got all the way to the beginning.

Me:Yeah about that....

I'm going to pay for that damn dinner for the rest of my life.

8 ) Have 75 views of this blog in one day.

This one was very important to me, because I base my entire self worth on how many people care to find out about my trips to grocery store or minor mental breakdowns.

I actually achieved this goal the day after I posted it. I think I'm going to have to go ahead and thank facebook for this one. I posted a link as my status and my highest daily stat went from 39 it 98. So thanks homies!

38)Inspire at least one other person to make a '101 in 1001' list.

I'm crossing this one off the list with the help of a young, up and coming new photographer named Kandice. You are definitely going to to want to follow her blog not only for updates in her list but because she is, for sure, the next Annie Leibovitz, and you'll be able to say you knew her before she was taking controversial pictures of teenage megastars and the newborn pics of Brangelina's 17th child. Her list can be found on her photography blog................ HERE!

And just as of last night I can link you to another 101 list made by a very good friend HERE. Get over there and harass her for me, so that she keeps up her list! Specifically mention the dancing at a bar thing.... I've been trying for 5 years to get her to do that!

Basically, to sum up, everyone's doing a list but you. So jump on the band wagon and send me the link because I LOVE these things!

The updated list can be found HERE or at anytime over there <---- in the left hand column under the title.... 101 in 1001.

I Hope He Gets His Passport In Time

2009-12-08T19:35:00.000-08:00

I think this is something that every parent has happen to them at one point in their parenting career, but this was a first for us.

It's my fault really. After I realized I had a little grinch on my hands, I did everything in my power to MAKE him love the holidays. The boys eat, sleeps and breaths Christmas.

Yesterday in the passport line Sawyer looked up at me all excited and said (very loudly), 'Mommy look... Santa Clause!'

The white bearded, jolly looking gentlemen behind us in line pretended not to notice, but I knew the damage was done.

Disappointment

2009-12-04T19:32:00.000-08:00

I almost didn't want to publish my earlier post. I wanted to save it so that I had something to post on a day that I didn't have something so blog worthy going on.

Because today was passport picture day. I have been dreading passport picture day for months. We are taking a trip in January that we have been planning since the summer and I have put off getting our passports until a month before the trip, because the very notion of this day would send me into a fit of cold sweats and eye ticks.

Then I started this blog. Suddenly, through the shadows of terror, I could see a glimmer of light. Epic hissy fits and hours spent giving a photographer the same symptoms of passport photo day that I was experiencing, make good blogging material. As today inched closer and closer and I started to get almost excited. I found myself whispering advice to my children like, 'If you get frustrated on passport photo day, just start throwing things. It will make you feel much better!' and 'We can only afford to take one of you on vacation, first person to make the photographer cry gets to come'.

I wasted my breath.

We took them in, they sat straight in the chair, closed their mouths and looked blankly at the camera. Just the way the government likes it.

It's so disappointing to think I'm raising well behaved children

"You Are What I Never Knew I Always Wanted"*

2009-12-04T19:28:00.000-08:00

*-From the 1997 movie 'Fools Rush In'

Without the use of language or full motor control, Sean finds little ways to show me he loves me every single day.

He wakes up every 3 hours all night long.

He won't take a bottle keeping me from leaving him for any more then 2 hours.

He throws up promptly after each meal.

He takes my putting him down to clean as a personal insult.

I'm tired, secluded, stinky and living in chaos, but I've never felt so loved!

101 Things In 1001 Days

2009-12-02T19:25:00.000-08:00

I was going to make this a ‘210 Things to do in 2010′ list, but in looking for inspiration I stumbled upon a ‘101 things to do in 1001 days’ challenge. This seemed a lot more realistic so I’m going to give it a try!
Start Date: December 3rd, 2009
End Date: August 30th, 2012
Incomplete
Complete
1)Write 450 posts for this blog (40/450)
2)Knit my family stockings. Turns out this is much easier said then done, or so says the knitting needles I bought 2 months that have remained untouched except to be used as WMD’s by my son. (0/4)
3)Run a marathon. This one was inspired by the contestants on ‘The Biggest Loser’ and my dreams to have Bob get all sweaty running the final mile with me. I’m pretty sure this is exactly how my marathon run will play out.
4)~~Take a trip out of the country. With one already booked for January 8th I feel fairly confident that I’ll be able to do this one.~~ (Good times)
5)Rachel Ray Week. For months I’ve been talking about doing a full week of recipes from my Rachel Ray cookbook and for whatever reason it keeps not happening. We’ll see who comes out a winner that week, Rachel or the hot sauce. (0/7)
6)Get Sean sleeping through the night.
7)Potty train Sawyer.
8 )~~Have 75 views of this blog in one day. Rest assured wordpress does not count my trips to this blog as views, so August 29th, 2012 I may be begging for your help on this one.~~ (No Begging Required)
9)Write a novel. Why not?
10)Watch all 6 seasons of ‘Sex and the City’ (0/6)
11)Have my Christmas shopping done by December 1st
12)Make a trip to Ottawa to visit my best! Miss you Erin!
13)Sell something on Kijiji. I just feel like this is something I need to do.
14)Potty train Sean.
15)Get a new camera. Which I will keep away from my children. I’ve learned my lesson.
16)Get a copy of photoshop.
17)Take a digital camera course.
18)Take a photoshop course.
19)Enroll Sawyer in a sport.
20)Enroll Sean in a sport.
21)Have both kids enrolled in swim lessons.
22)Visit Calgary for the stampede
23)Add 20 new facebook friends. (4/20)
24)Teach Sean to walk.
25)Read at least 25 of the books on this list (1/25)
26)~~Get drunk. Having been either preggo or with a child under 1 for 3 years now, I feel I deserve it~~ (Thoroughly Enjoyed)
27)Get a custom layout for this blog. In other words ‘Pimp My Blog’
28)Donate to the Cancer Society.
29)Donate to the Heart and Stroke Foundation.
30)Get another tattoo
31)Send a care package to a friend. Hoping it’s you? I’m not opposed to bribes
32)Make a will. Hoping you in it? I’m not opposed to bribes
33)Open RSP’s
34)Sleep outside.
35)Take my kids to the zoo and an amusement park in one weekend.
36)Take my kids to a museum. Seems like something a ‘good parent’ would do.
37)Make a dream board.
38)~~Inspire at least one other person to make a ‘101 in 1001′ list.~~ (Wanna see 'em?)
39)Buy a bigger house.
40)See Wicked live
41)Not touch my computer for 24 executive hours.
42)Become debt free (except mortgage)
43)Go to a wedding. I guess this one’s out of my control. Someone get married!
44)~~Get a drastic haircut </strike> (Ended up with 'Mom Hair')~~
45)Get a spray tan
46)Take the kids to see my parents 3 times. (0/3)
47)Be the SITS feature blogger.
48)Spend a whole night playing video games with Kevin
49)Blog everyday for a month
50)Start my Christmas shopping on Boxing Day
51)Become an airmiles Gold member
52)Get to 75000 shoppers optimum points (0/75000)
53)Eat dinner in everyday for a month
54)Eat out every meal for a day
55)Get Domino neutered (Sorry Domino)
56)See a baby in it’s first 24hrs of life.
57)Eat at the Olive Garden
58)Make dinner for my in-laws
59)Learn to make goulash
60)Go on 3 weekend getaways with Kevin (0/3)
61)Have my wedding dress dry cleaned
62)Make a cake from scratch
63)Fill in 100 pages (50 front and back) of a paper journal. (0/100)
64)Finish Sawyer’s baby book
65)Start and finish Sean’s baby book
66) ~~Finish this list in one day~~ (It almost killed me)
67)Take the boys to the drive in
68)Plan and execute a very special 30th birthday for Kevin. I’m going to have to keep the details vague on this one.
69)Learn to make sticky buns from scratch
70)~~Win the lottery</strike> (About freakin time)~~
71)Have $5000 saved. (0/5000)
72)Finish watching ‘The West Wing’
73)Go ice skating
74)Buy an SUV
75)Have a shopping weekend in the states
76)Get a new bed set
77)Cook my family a four course meal. Hot sauce optional.
78)Invest in some quality MAC makeup (coverup, blush, eyeshadow, eyeliner, mascara) with some professional advice – Randelle shopping trip? (0/5 items)
79)~~Do our taxes on time</strike> (I just hope the gov't doesn't expect this to become a regular thing)~~
80)Subscribe to a magazine
81)Watch all of Audrey Hepburn’s movies (0/28 I did not realize there were so many)
82)~~~~Fit into size 6 jeans~~ (Believe it or not)~~
83)Plant a vegetable garden
84)Send out Christmas Cards
85)Have Sawyer and Sean pick out presents for the tree of life.
86)Host a dinner party
87)Make Kat & Kevin scrapbook <3
88)Go to an NHL game
89)Get a new job
90)Buy a ticket in the expensive local lottery
91)Replace the bedroom windows
92)Stand on the glass floor at the CN Tower
93)Have a whole day without timeouts. No matter what they do
94)~~Visit a family member when it’s not a family function~~(PLAYDATE)
95)BBQ a meal by myself
96)Buy an expensive bag
97)~~Tip a great server 100%~~ (BALLIN')
98)Sleep until noon.
99)Go shopping in the middle of the night
100)Secret goal
101)Make a new list for my next 1001 days (1/101)
I’m going to try to do a weekly update on my progress but apparently I’m going to be very busy for the next 1001 days.
Wish me luck!

I'm Sensing a Pattern

2009-12-01T19:24:00.000-08:00

This evening my husband walked in the door, screwed up his face and asked what's that smell?

I made stir fry for dinner again.

Catch More Flies With Hunny

2009-11-30T19:21:00.000-08:00

At 2 years old my son is already the master of manipulation.

It started simple, flashing a huge smile in the direction of authority, while doing something he knew he shouldn't.

Then he took advantage of how proud we were that he had learned to say please and thanks to get the world handed to him on a silver platter.

But all of that pales in comparison to his newest tactic.

While doing the laundry I looked up to see his little head poke out down the stairs. Just as I was about to open my mouth and start the 3 second countdown to timeout, he looked me in the eye, smiled and in his cute little high-pitched voice said, 'Hi Hunny'. Then just now I asked him politely to stop eating dog food and still flying from his earlier success he calmly replied, 'No Hunny'.

I'm so out of my league with this kid.

Round One

2009-11-28T19:19:00.000-08:00

Right now my hubby and Sawyer are at each other's throats over what to watch on television. Kevin wants to play NHL '10, while my little boy wants to watch Fifi and the Flowertots. I can just imagine what's going though my hubby's head. Every once in a while it's nice to just sit back and laugh!

Please

2009-11-26T19:15:00.000-08:00

15 more minutes pleeeease.

Just lay down and let me change your diaper please.

You can't just have milk for breakfast. Please eat your toast.

Put mommy's coffee down please.

Share please.

Please let go of my hair.

Please let go of your brother's hair.

Please let go of the cat's hair.

Sit down and eat your lunch please.

Can mommy please watch ONE big person show?

Give your brother back his toy please.

Please stop crying.

Pleeeesase just let me make dinner.

Please get into the tub.

Please get out of the tub.

Pleeeeease just go to sleep

The word please has lost all meaning to my family

I HEART Christmas

2009-11-24T19:12:00.000-08:00

I feel that it is necessary for you to know that I am absolutely fanatical about Christmas!

I love everything about it!

It is because of this love of Christmas that I'm starting to wonder if Sawyer is the same child I pushed out 2 years ago.

After weeks of begging and making promises I was not prepared to keep my husband agreed to put out the Christmas decorations. I thought it would be a cute idea to have the Santa Clause Parade playing in the background as we decorated, but hitting the play button on that recording caused Sawyer to throw himself to the ground, screaming and thrashing like he had been slapped in the face.

That was my first hint.

After I switched the t.v. to an edge of your seat episode of Caillou, we pulled out the Christmas Tree decorations. Sawyer was much more keen on eating them then actually decorating with them. Hint#2.

Hint numbers 3, 4, and 5 came with the destruction of a Santa sleigh, a wooden snowman and a stuffie of the jolly, old man himself (I'm still cleaning pieces of his beard up off the floor 6 days later).

I'm not sure where I went wrong with him, but hopefully I have more luck forcing my love of Christmas on Sean!

My First Top 10

2009-11-18T19:08:00.000-08:00

I am always looking for new ways to waste time on the internet ,and since stalking people I haven't seen in 5 years through their facebook status' can only take up so much time, I've turned to mommy blogs to fill those empty places in my agenda. I've been to quite a few now and it has been brought to my attention that a blog is not a blog without a Top 10 List. So in light of this discovery (and because I have nothing else to write about), I have complied my first ever 'This Or The Housework Top 10'. It is entitled...

'Favourite' Things My Kids Do

The Favourite is in '' because I couldn't think of a nice way to say 'Things that make me want to tear my hair out and go running, screaming and crying from this house.

10)Make this noise... 'Angh'. If you have a toddler you know exactly the noise. If you don't, you're probably thinking 'why does a noise make her want to scream and cry?' Just wait.... just wait!

9)Insist (through ear piercing screeches) that putting a 6 month old in a highchair or anywhere but on your lap at meal time is a form of abuse. Then taking advantage of their seat at the table, by grabbing food and shampooing their hair with it.

8)Reaching down while I'm changing a poopy diaper and flinging it across the room (Both boys find this extremely amusing).

7)'Helping' with the grocery shopping by picking up glass jars of spaghetti sauce that we don't even need and dropping them. Then announcing 'Uh Oh MESS' for anyone in the store that missed the crash and shattering glass sound.

6)Waking up at 3am and then 5am and then 7am.... ugh!

5)'Helping' with the laundry by unfolding everything I've just folded and then piling it all on the dog's back to see how far she can run before it falls off.

4)Waiting until they have a mouth full of something really pleasant looking like smashed green peas, and then raspberrying it all over anyone in a 5ft radius.

3)Hiding food in places that guarantees you won't find it until a nice thick fur coat has grown on it.

2)Refusing to wear pants.

1)Learning to walk and talk.

There we go folks, I'm official now!

*********EDIT********** As I was writing this Sawyer took advantage of the fact that I was distracted to reach into his diaper and use it's contents to smear on his face like war paint.

Walk A Mile In Little Shoes

2009-11-16T19:05:00.000-08:00

The other night we bundled up the boys and took them to the local Santa Clause Parade.

We saw a parade grand marshall, Sawyer saw a pirate.

We saw a group of llamas, Sawyer saw a herd of cows.

We saw the Hamburgler from McDonalds, Sawyer saw Zigby the Zebra

We saw Santa Clause, Sawyer saw a Grandpa.

Sometimes it's nice to just sit and see the world through a 2 year old's eyes.

Elmo Night Night

2009-11-14T19:02:00.000-08:00

I know you've all (all 3 of you that actually read this) have been on the edge of your seats since it leaked on the internet that we were getting family photos. Well Sean did not give me any good blogging material. He sat up straight, smiled for the camera, even managed to not throw up on his new sweater! Sawyer, however, did not disappoint! Before we even left the house he had gotten a hold of a marker and given himself a beautiful maroon goatee and uni-brow.

Once we got there the real battle began.

He refused to stand with us for family picture and so the store's stuffed Elmo is in our portrait, we had to ditch the idea of a picture of just the two of them (it was just not happening), and I so wish you could see the portrait of just him.... it sums up the whole trip! Of course no trip to the grocery store is complete without an epic hissy fit and ours came when it was time to leave and give the photographer the Elmo back! After attracting the attention of every single person in the store we convinced him to tuck Elmo in for a nap and leave the store. Now every time we so much as drive past the store he yells 'Elmo night night"! Grocery shopping just got a whole new challenge!

Teaser

2009-11-12T19:00:00.000-08:00

Spoiler Alert

This afternoon we are taking the kids to the grocery store portrait studio for holiday family photos. I could hear the poor woman on the phone cringe when I told her my kids ages!

Wish us luck!

Adventures in Grocery Land

2009-11-10T18:58:00.000-08:00

Grocery shopping with young children should be an olympic sport. Or illegal.

The other day I was pulling out everything I needed to make dinner and found that the milk pitcher was in the fridge but did not, in fact, contain any milk. My stomach sank when upon further inspection I found we were out of milk entirely. My Hubby was still at work and I needed the milk to make dinner, which means I was going to have to bring my boys to the grocery store -wait for it- by myself. Here are some highlights from my trip;

*Sean decided that grocery shopping is not his 'thing' and instead busied himself screaming at the top of his lungs. Apparantly he finds it amusing to see people give me the 'what did you do to that poor child' stink eye

*Sensing that this was a stressful situation for his mom, Sawyer helped by refusing to hold on to the cart like he'd been taught, and instead running wildly through the store. I can tell you I no longer judge parents that drag there kids around stores on a leash.

*Having now exhausted himself, Sawyer took a breather to pick himself out a stuffed animal. I informed him that the stuffed monkey was not in my grocery budget this week and that since he has yet to obtain a job or any other source of income for that matter, he could not have it. To my great surprise my 2 year old could not handle this logic, resulting in him plopping himself down on the ground and matching Sean scream for scream.

Next time we run out of milk, I'm ordering pizza.

Dry Spell Over

2009-11-04T18:55:00.000-08:00

I'm sure that everyone that knows me well was shocked to see that my diligent blogging came to an abrupt halt a little over a week ago. It's just so out of character for me! Regardless I'm back now and we've had a busy week! Here it is in a nutshell;

Friday my sweet little baby Sean turned 6 months causing me to reflect on how quickly the past 6 months have flown by and to cry over the fact that he'll soon be leaving the nest to go off to college. My husband found this very amusing!

Saturday Sawyer attended his first concert. A rocking Backyardigans show! After much debabting we decided that my hubby would be the one to take him to his first concert as long as he took lots of pics. He of course came home with none because "no one else was taking pictures". But Sawyer had a great time and that's what matters... I guess! Saturday did not end there however, after the concert we took to the streets. Sean was a skunk breaking the cuteness barrier with a little heart on his bum that read 'lil stinker' and we wrestled Sawyer into the Pablo (a backyardigan) costume he picked out himself and then refused to wear. We kept trick-or-treating to a minimum, just visiting close friends and family. Sawyer enriched everyone's night by greeting them with his famous 'shy guy stink eye'.

To round off our eventful weekend Sunday night ushered in our first toddler night terror. Sawyer woke us up at 1:30am terrified that the vacuum was going to get him. We assured him he was safe by letting him hog our bed and steal all the covers.

I'm pretty sure we're knee deep in teething so I'm sure I'll have lots of stories about sleepless nights and laundryless days in the weeks to come! Keep tuning in!

Some Days

2009-10-26T18:51:00.000-07:00

Earlier today I was doing the dishes and I felt something hit my leg. I looked over to see Sawyer had pushed a chair up against the counter and was climbing up, dish towel in hand. He stood up proudly on the chair and announced 'My Help!' and started drying the pots and pans in the sink.

Most days I find myself wondering where I went wrong, but I guess I must be doing something right :P

My Mistake

2009-10-23T18:49:00.000-07:00

I was concerned that people wouldn't believe my previous claims that my son's left hand is possessed so I went and dug up this picture from a family photo shoot we did when he was about 6 weeks old.

Turns out he's just a bad egg.

Crossover

2009-10-23T18:48:00.000-07:00

I just got excited because this afternoon's episode of 'Go Diego Go' was a crossover episode with his cousin's show 'Dora the Explorer'.

How did I let it come to this?

Idle Hand

2009-10-23T18:43:00.000-07:00

I have found my arch nemesis in my son Sean's left hand.

The thing has a mind of it's own.

It hits and punches (hard), it pinches, and it pulls hair.

His right hand does none of this.

The absolute worst thing it does though is to wait until the rest of Sean's body is just giving in to a sound sleep, and reach up and rip his suckie out of his mouth, sending him into hysterics. I have no idea what to do but I am POSITIVE that this left hand issue is going to get him in all kinds of trouble growing up. Fortunately since I am right handed and my husband is not, I'm sure that it will all be blamed on him as opposed to my parenting.

On a side note I had big intentions to come on here and compare my son's possessed left hand to the movie 'Idle Hands'. Since I have never actually seen the movie and since I take this blogging stuff VERY seriously I decided to do a little research. Of course by 'do a little research' I mean I wikipedia'd it. After reading the movie's synopsis I decided not to make the comparison as that movie is messed up.

My Encounter With A Mythological Creature

2009-10-20T18:37:00.000-07:00

One of my favourite past times, and by favourite I mean I would give it up in a nano second given half a chance, is driving around town at 4 in the morning. Sean and I get all bundled up and hit up the fanciest neighbourhoods in the city with the intent to induce dreaming in both of us. After three hours of trying to rock my apparently nocturnal son to sleep, I decided that last night (well this morning) was the perfect time for a drive. I was wrong. Car seat in hand I headed toward my car only to be met at the door by what I can only assume was a werewolf (it was very dark), that had somehow gotten the lid off our garbage bins (and by lid of course I mean the piece of plywood we lay across the top of the bins because we forgot to get lids when we purchased the bins and are too embarrassed to go back to home depot and admit it). The 100lb beast had knocked it over and was having a feast of chicken wing bones and pizza crusts, because in addition to hating housework I am also not huge on cooking (you can see why my hubby snatched me up, I'm a catch). Instantly my motherly instincts kicked in and I backed up and put the carseat on the table leaving the door wide open. Fortunately my plan to act irrationally and somehow have things turn in my favour, worked like a charm, and the wolf took off down the driveway instead of into my kitchen.

Despite the favourable outcome we did not go for that drive last night and will most likely never leave the house again.

So, long story short, you can expect an increase of posts in the days ahead.

IPOD Sensitivity

2009-10-19T18:34:00.000-07:00

Both my boys are in bed fast asleep and there's a mountain of laundry in my bedroom calling my name, so I ran straight over to hide behind my computer until it shuts the heck up.

Instead I'm going to write about a very real problem I'm dealing with.

Over the weekend I went and got myself an MP3 player.

That's not my problem.

I came straight home and loaded it up with the limited number of songs I have downloaded to my computer.

That's not my problem either.

My problem came when I was out with some friends and they asked to see it. I felt like I had been asked to strip off all my clothes and prance around the room in the buff. As their eyes passed over my song list I could feel the judgement oozing out of them. I silently prayed that they would notice all the classic rock I had on there (I hear that's very hip right now) and was already trying to come up with excuses for how that Miley song had wound up on there. When they handed it back without any smart comments I felt relief wash over me.

But I know that I can't take back what they saw and I know that our relationship will never be the same because of it.

Oh and if we could just keep that Miley thing between you and me that be awesome. Thanks.

Childhood Obesity

2009-10-18T18:31:00.000-07:00

Well I don't know what you did this weekend, but I found the cause of childhood obesity. After the news of this discovery breaks I'm betting that this blog is going to become very popular so go ahead and give yourself a pat on the back for being with me before I hit the big time. Anyways, back to my find. It hit me like a ton of bricks today while listening to my mother in law talk my son out of the apple he had asked for and into a handful of gummy bears. Ever since he's been able to digest high fructose corn syrup, she's made a point to run out to the store before every visit and stock up on everything she wouldn't allow her own children to eat growing up. So that's it, the indisputable cause of childhood obesity. So please stop depriving your children of such valuable entertainment tools as the television, computer and most importantly video games. There's nothing wrong with them. It's all a conspiracy set in place by all the 'sweet', little old grannies and grandpas out there, to fatten up our children. It's all just so Hanzel and Gretel.

Guess all that's left to do now is sit back and wait for the big, fat gov't appreciation cheques to roll in. I'll keep you posted.

Please

2009-10-17T02:09:00.000-07:00

I'm just a girl, standing in front of a boy, asking him to please go to sleep.....

Real Life

2009-10-16T18:20:00.000-07:00

Tonight my family and I spent the evening with some great friends, one of which we haven't seen in quite some time. So long in fact that we had not met his girlfriend of two years and he hadn't met our two boys. The best part of the evening though was that we just found out that our friend and his girlfriend are expecting their first child this march. My oldest son congratulated them by screaming through dinner, insulting the hostess' cooking and running around the livingroom naked. My youngest son, by throwing up all over daddy-to-be. When the idea of a playdate was brought up, poor mommy-to-be giggled politely and quickly changed the subject.

Needless to say they called it a night early, a little paler then when the night started.

At Least There's Hot Sauce

2009-10-14T17:53:00.000-07:00

Well I've been wanting to start a mommy blog for a while. Raising a 2 year old and a 5 month old has left me just enough time to get a moderate amount of housework done and I've been looking for a way to phase that out for some time. Mission accomplished. I've been holding out on starting it though as I wanted my first entry to be very special and meaningful and finally an incident has occured that I've deemed 'first blog entry' worthy. Yesterday my husband called me from work to let me know he was on his way home and to ask what was for dinner. When I informed him of the culinary delight I had prepared for that evening he responded with 'oh, well at least there's hot sauce'.

For all my future followers (of which I'm sure will shortly be in the thousands) who would like to know the recipe for my famous 'At least there's hot sauce stir fry' please don't hesitate to ask.

This Or The Housework

Digging for Treasure

Happy Kind Of Birthday Hunny

At Least I Won't Have to Worry About Him Being a Teenage Father...

It's My Anniversary and I'll be Snotty If I Want To

Life Experiences

Day in the life

What?!?! None Of You Thought To Warn Me?

Paying the Price

The Fastest Year Of My Life

A Revelation

Sean's Got Moves!!

Potty Training Tips

Happy Easter!!

Pardon Me?!?!?!

One of Those Days

Keep the Change, Ya Filthy Animal!!

101 in 1001 Update #10

Actually

Beautiful Blogger

Work Hard, Play Hard

Apologies, Excuses and Stomach Contents

I'm Back

R.I.P. Mac

Happy Birthday to Me!!!!!!

101 in 1001 Update #9

A Little Birdie Told Me...

Skunks Got Stink, My Kids Got Cute

101 in 1001 Update #8

An Open Letter To Sean's Teeth

Pretty Sure They're Conspiring Against Me

101 in 1001 Update #7

Over The Top

Major Suckage

Christmas in January - Don't Hate

New House Fever

Operation Name Change

101 in 1001 Update #6

April Showers bring..... FAN-FREAKIN-TASTIC Blog Designs

Love Hurts

Starting Today....

Why I've Decided to Keep My Children. Well, Sawyer At Least.

Perched Upon My Throne

New Frontier

101 in 1001 Update #5

You Know You're A Mom When...

101 in 1001 Update #4

My Sincerest Apologies

101 in 1001 Update#3

It's About Time You Got Here

Oops! I Did It Again

101 Things Update #2

101 Things Update #1

I Hope He Gets His Passport In Time

Disappointment

"You Are What I Never Knew I Always Wanted"*

101 Things In 1001 Days

I'm Sensing a Pattern

Catch More Flies With Hunny

Round One

Please

I *HEART* Christmas

My First Top 10

Walk A Mile In Little Shoes

Elmo Night Night

Teaser

Adventures in Grocery Land

Dry Spell Over

Some Days

My Mistake

Crossover

Idle Hand

My Encounter With A Mythological Creature

IPOD Sensitivity

Childhood Obesity

Please

Real Life

At Least There's Hot Sauce

I HEART Christmas